Pruning

So to go along with the church theme for today I have been thinking about pruning.... church pruning to be exact.

A long time ago I wrote about LVC needing to be pruned for people that were not in line with what God had in store for us as a church. At the time a knew a few people were leaving (or going to possibly leave). But not all left because they disagreed with something. Some people just left because they felt called somewhere else or they needed to move... or whatever. Yet, since that time the church is much smaller.. numbers have dropped, offering has gone down and yet, I have the feeling we are beginning to gain momentum.

I think the church had filled up with a bunch of people with not the same vision. LVC was trying to be baptist, pentecostal, vineyard and reformed all at the same time... while offending no one... which is not going to happen.... in fact it was making the church dysfunctional. So now we are smaller and still finding out what God has in store for us as a community but we seem to have a vision. At least now, most of the branches that were once in the way of growth (of our church) have since been pruned in one way or another.

Now I am not saying the people that left (or were pruned away) did not fit or would not fit today (although some wouldn't fit) all I am saying is that it seems in order to make the church start to move again there had to be a major overhaul. MAJOR. Like most of the leadership and a lot of the big givers, a lot of people. But that is what needed to be done. any God has been faithful in all of it. I am glad that the leadership didn't fear losing some people... they feared God (and that is what matters).

Yet, all this time I had/have been thinking... "What if I was one of the people that needed to be "pruned away" was me?" I always wondered if I would be ok with that. I just had felt like I tried to hold on so long to be at the church... yet, in the end I always seemed to have the cards stacked against me (in one way or another). For a while I was frustrated but now I wonder if God wasn't involved in the whole thing anyways. I wonder if I needed to be off staff... maybe that was a good thing.. for me and for the church... maybe I was holding things back. I know that God knows what is best... and in hindsight I am beginning to think that it is better that I am not around.

I feel like I am really learning about God lately instead of being frustrated at everything that goes on inside the church right now. If the church didn't need me to be pruned from being on staff ... I needed it. I know that I want to be in ministry (at least that is what I think for now) but being in ministry leading people doesn't work well if you yourself aren't firmly locked into what God is saying. God doesn't need another infomercial spokes person, a person that knows the right lines to say when the camera is on but in reality doesn't really know what the heart is of the people trying to sell it. That would have been me... I was actually at times getting less and less plugged into the Holy Spirit and more and more learning the knowledge of how a church runs.

Now you and I both know that I would never had said whatever the "company line" was just to be a spokes person but still... I was getting further and further from knowing God's heart for me and for the church... and that doesn't add up if you want to be in ministry.