Well, here we go here comes another year. I am glad this year is over hopefully we can have fresh start as this year was far from amazing. That being said.... I have learned so much, about myself especially. I have realized I need to change a lot of things and also through the hard times I have been forced to change a lot of things that I wouldn't have otherwise. Hopefully this year will bring a new job (I have an interview with Heights of Hope on Friday) and a better economy for the nation as a whole.
So here is my year end reflection:
I realized I stressed out a lot this year. Catie had told me I have been much more tense since my parents started having problems 4 yrs ago... that is a long time... and not healthy for me or others around me. I have realized this year that I need to work on stress. I had found peace in my life being not full of stress before and now my life has a lot more stress and I realized I really didn't have my faith in Christ taking all my worries. I had faith in my regularity, money and the things that I was able to do... I wasn't living by faith. This year I learned a little more what it means to trust God when you have no control of your life. I am still working on letting go and giving my junk to God.
My kids grew and we had my last baby this year.... Judah Joshua. He is awesome and I am actually really glad that he was the last one... just that makes me less stressed :) I love my kids though. In this year they have really grown... I have seen Noelen grown up from a baby into a little boy (weird) and Soe is now running all over the house and soon Jude will be crawling.... I love to see them grow and learn. They are amazing. They have brought their own stresses this year in their naughty times. (Noelen has gotten into medicine, mouse poison and tooth paste (yeah, he tried a bit of each... scary, but he was fine)). It has been a rough year on them but they are great. I just know they have seen and felt tons of stress around the house... next year I am making sure that is not the case.
We finished our basement this year... which is amazing considering we had no money at the time. This year the basement flooded with sewage 2-3 times and we lost a lot of stuff... especially the last time... we didn't catch it in time and it really backed up. But after cleaning up once with some good friends and the second time by myself... we called our insurance company and they replaced all of our stuff we lost....... including new carpet so now our basement is awesome.... we also replaced out main drain line to the city main line so now we won't be having sewage in our basement. YEAH! And the insurance company paid enough (because I did most of the work myself) to help us pay our mortgage when I lost my job at the church.... so God provided and I learned a lot in the process. In fact, I just finished the bathroom about a week ago... it looks pretty good... not perfect but there is no standing sewage in the shower and the floor is level and it has a sink and toilet.... so it is nice. (Actually it is the nicest bathroom in the house now... but that isn't saying too much). So being able to finish our basement and get paid for it was a big blessing. I didn't see it at the time but it was really a good thing.
The hardest part of the year was not having a job for months and months and months....
It has been stretching and defeating and horrible. My family went from paying bills to being behind and worrying about where the money was going to come from but again God provided some how. Through family and friends and random videos I've done, we have been able to make it month to month so far... honestly it is hard to believe... but in all of this I have learned so much. From humility to a real faith, it has all been stretching and continues to be stretching but I know it has been good for me. It has been necessary, in making me a stronger Christian. Helping me to actually be able to relate to other people. The people I most want to help in life.
If I could pick out one thing that I would take from the year it is the importance of community. Some one at church said that same thing on Sunday. When you have nothing, Christian community is all you have.... no things... no job but people who love you and will listen. (That is a big part of what being a Christian really is). I have learned that without true community, I am lost and lonely even with my wife and kids. I have learned that Christianity is all about community and sharing your life with one another. I have learned that I believe being in a small group in not only a good thing but a necessary thing. If you aren't in one you are probably more alone in life than you need to be and you probably aren't getting HONESTLY stretched as much as you need to be to be healthy and thriving. Don't lie to yourself, you need Christian community. I have heard excuses but they are all lame... Be open and get in a group that loves you.
well that is all for 2008..... here comes 2009
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